yes? no? is it? maybe? could be?
Sunday, March 27, 2005
the search is on...
Posted by Kat at
11:19 PM
5 comments
Thursday, March 24, 2005
life in black & white 4
Posted by Kat at
1:38 AM
3 comments
life in black & white 3
Posted by Kat at
1:36 AM
1 comments
life in black & white 2
Posted by Kat at
1:34 AM
4 comments
life in black & white 1
Posted by Kat at
1:32 AM
1 comments
piece of art?
Very proudly showed this picture to a friend, thinking it was a masterpiece I had taken...he looked at it and asked..."kis ki ultrasound report hai yeh?" Dismissed his comment thinking he has no idea what art is...!
Posted by Kat at
1:21 AM
5 comments
Tuesday, March 22, 2005
happy mondays
I have funny notions in life. One of them being that the first day of the week outlines how the remaining six days are going to be. There were lots of things I had dumped on Monday. Wanted to start exercise, obviously it had to be Monday. Shopping, Monday. Dieting-Monday. Work, obviously Monday. So, come Monday, I didn’t know how to expect the week to go.
Things at office were in the fast lane. Busy work hours. After work wanted to go shopping, on the way a friend called saying he was dropping in at my place. Trip detoured-no shopping, rushed home. Had a nice long conversation with him. After his leaving, wanted to go for a walk-but a quick random dinner plan had materlised with my Indus gang. Quickly changed, showered & went for the dinner.
Great food, great ambience, great company! It’s amazing how good a feeling it is meeting up with friends. (one conclusion: friends are honestly all that you need to survive-actually maybe not!)
Lots of laughter, leg pulling, trip planning, good food eating, remembering the good old college days. Parting on the happy note that a beach trip should be planned for coming weekend.
Coming home meant that the much awaited sleep should be grabbed on to. But another friend called to just catch up & obviously track of time was lost!
At 1:30 am, it was too long a day, but nevertheless I sense a beginning of a very friend oriented, nothing goes as planned, busy week! No regrets, love every second of it!
Posted by Kat at
3:18 AM
1 comments
love or chocolate?
Posted by Kat at
1:57 AM
4 comments
Sunday, March 20, 2005
I want to:
- quickly earn loads of money & then go on a world tour.
- Get engaged in the sky (while sky diving).
- Go to the moon & hibernate for a while.
- Be a part of the national geographic team.
- Be a designer who can convince the clients that the design is great without any amendments.
- Open schools providing free quality education so that all Pakistani kids are educated.
- Own the place where I work for a day & see if things can turn for better if I run them my way.
- Sit at home for a while & do nothing & be paid for doing that nothing.
- Own a pent house over looking the golden gate bridge.
- Eat all the nice & fattening stuff & not put on any weight.
- Live a certain period of my life vagabonding.
- Go bungee jumping.
- Go & hug the guy I have a crush on & tell him about my feelings.
- Understand what state of mind God was in when he created man.
- Put a pause on a day, so everything can be on a standstill.
- Own the Mohatta Palace & throw lavish parties there.
- Once again go to India with my friends and re-have all the great times.
- Kill all the traditions that just don’t make any sense.
Posted by Kat at
10:56 PM
2 comments
Saturday, March 19, 2005
Am I being too selfish?
I feel I am going through a phase of insanity-a deeper insanity. I am in that transition where I want my space,
even from my best friend. (I hope this is a normal situation). Not that I hate her or anything-its just that her
actions are way beyond me & I maybe dont have the courage to say this out loud. Not that i am afraid of her or anything
I just dont know how she perceives the whole situation.....!
Like for instance I made friends with this guy "U" & I introduced him to my friend "Miss A". It was a group of 3. Movies,
lunches, just hanging out-everything was in a pair plus one.
When things took a turn, I have no idea.
Their friendship turned into long term commitment and i was the last one to find out!
No I was not intrested in "U", but I just felt betrayed and sad. I found out about their relationship not from either one of them, but
a third person altogether. I went into my shell, not knowing how to react. The result being that I recouped with "Miss A", but to date my relationship with
"U" is very very constrained. The only regret being that I lost a good friend in him. "U" & I dont meet anymore & even if we do accidentally bump
into each other we just exchange a few words out of politeness & formality. I told myself that if they both are happy, that is what actually matters...
Six months down the lane-life moves on. I meet this another guy who is a great friend. This guy "S" is introduced to "Miss A". All is good.Again
everything starts happening in a group of 3. Its a nice feeling with with two great friends. I cherish them both. Each of them have a unique relationship
with me. Suddenly, I am not getting good vibes from either of them, or maybe I am reading way too much into the situation.
But if lunches, movies, itwaar bazaar & long drives are happening without me what am I supposed to conclude?
Is the six month history repeating itself? What happened to "u" and "Miss A's" relationship?
Am I on the verge of losing another great friend?
Am I acting too selfishly & immaturely?
Am I too possessive?
Way too many questions bombard my mind. Maybe just getting some space would help....or maybe I am supposed to make new best friends
every 6 months????
Posted by Kat at
9:55 AM
2 comments
Thursday, March 17, 2005
what exactly are they looking for?
A steaming cup of coffee, cosy sofas and the company of a best friend is just a perfect way to unwind
after a crazy day at work. Conversation was light. Mostly catching up on what all had been happening
in the past four days when we didnt get a chance to talk. Work, family, happenings and friends is what
was talked about. He casually mentioned about being suddenly extremly friendly with this one girl eho he once
liked, who just broke up with her boyfriend and who is apparenly also going through PMS.
So why did he look so upset and unhappy?
On inquiring I found out that she calls up at all odd hours at night and wants to get into a long term relationship.
"Whats the issue?" I ask.
Ï still like her but dont want to commit."
On hearing this I realised how insane men can be. He was ok flirting, but didnt want to commit...didnt want to let go of her either.
Another fermale-settle down with her. "nahin, shes not my kind, shes just too nice."
"Too nice?" are you mad?
I am thinking just too much.
This another female we both know. What about her? Shes hot, shes nice, shes bitchy to a certain extent, career oriented,
educated...all is good. Whats with her? Hmm, shes good, but not wife material!
I just want to grab him and shake him. Where exactly is he thinking from? After he left, for a long while I was in the pensive modeWas I going insane or did he actually not make any sense? All these damn excuses...wants to flirt and enjoy but no question of settling down!
All the male species that i know of have similar issues! What exactly is the problem? I think "playing hard to get"is just the attitude that they should be given!
After lots more thinking I come to the conclusion that men generally are very insecure where commitment is concerned and therefore there is this whirlpool
of lousy excuses that they keep on struggling in!
Posted by Kat at
10:36 AM
4 comments
Sunday, March 13, 2005
long gone friends...
Its funny how time & marriage change people. A get together with a couple of friends was something that I was looking forward to-little realizing that I would come back with such a glum face. The conversation was completely alien to me, revolving around the kids education & the rising prices of diapers. The male halfs just talked about how expensive it is getting to raise a kid. Well, obviously if your three year old is wearing nothing less than Nike & Tommy kid, what do you expect? But then image is important too. A 13 month old who can’t even walk is wearing gap kids shoes…image…hello??? I look around; fake a smile hoping my other single friends come soon. The Martians descide to go & watch football. I sigh with relief…thank god the conversation just might make more sense now. Little do I know its going to be a complete bitching session about how mum in laws interfere, how grocery shopping is more convenient at Aghas & how much the females get dressed to go and pick their kids from the play school.
Normal talk, but not for me. What happened to all the movie, cosmetics, eating and shopping discussions? More bitching about the in laws. (Needless to say they all have wonderful in laws & that too is an issue in itself). Eyes suddenly turn to me-questioning. I smile, again fakely. All three bombard…when do I plan to tie the knot? Afterall this trashy talk, thank you, I just might not think about marriage for a while. Food is laid, eaten. I cant wait for it to get over. Two hours start to seem a bit too much. The same gang with whom two hours were two minutes.
I wonder what exactly marriage does to you. I leave, smile with the air of independence that I inhale. Pray to God silently…sometime down the lane please don’t let me be one of them, I don’t want to just complain, complain and then complain more! Goodluck to me. And once again I feel lucky to be single and living!
Posted by Kat at
9:32 PM
3 comments
Live or Exist?
And meeting one person can change so much? Every moment becomes more precious, the sun smiles at you more often, the humming of birds makes more sense, God looks at you more lovingly, obstacles become easier to overcome, the whole world suddenly starts looking at you with greater love, life becomes thus more beautiful, and you realize that instead of existing you start living…And then one such perfect day, reality strikes. Ways are parted, lanes changed. Everything is on a rebound. Do you stop living and start existing once again? Or are the memories enough to just cling on too and live a pretentiously happy life?
Posted by Kat at
9:29 PM
1 comments
Monday, March 07, 2005
You are not what you seem to be in moments of sadness. You are better than that!
When the master sees that the warrior is depressed, he says:
‘you are not what you seem to be in these moments of sadness. You are better than that.’
‘Many have left- for reasons we will never understand – but you are still here. Why did God carry off all those amazing people and leave you?’
“by now, millions of people will have given up. They don’t get angry, they don’t weep, they don’t do anything; they merely wait for time to pass. They have lost the ability to react.”
‘You, however are sad. That proves that you soul is still alive’
Excerpts from the manual of the warrior of light
Posted by Kat at
9:20 PM
3 comments
And heres to all the warriors…
Sometimes the warrior feels as if he were living two lives at once.
In one of them he is obliged to do all the things he does not want to do and to fight for ideas in which he does not believe. But there is another life, and he discovers it in his dreams, in his reading and his encounters with people who share his ideas.
The warrior allows his two lives to draw near. “There is a bridge that links what I do with what I would like to do” he thinks. Slowly, his dreams take over his everyday life, and then he realizes that he is ready for the thing he always wanted.
Then all that is needed is a little daring, and his two lives become one.
Posted by Kat at
9:18 PM
0 comments
Tuesday, March 01, 2005
Beginning of a story part 2 (the girls version)
During the meeting , where there was an interval at thinking-the girl would glance sideways to gather more of the guy sitting next to her. A glimpse of his resting hand revealed that he was a nail biter...aahgh!!! So much for always thinking that I want to marry a guy who wears nice shoes and has neat hands. What now? Cant tell my parents I cant marry him cause he dosent fit the packaging criteria. A look at the shoes...regular, black lace tie ups. Hmm....very usual. Small talk between families. He seems friendly, tried making conversation, maybe he wont mind my male friends. Maybe he and I will be best friends...?
Oh, he turns around and talks to her about her interests. "photography you said...is it work or hobby?
"passion" she replied with a smile. hmm....maybe he wont be a boring businessman afterall. More of talk between families. He asked for a soft drink instead of tea...is he not a tea drinker? Tea to me is what oxygen is to plants...maybe hes addicted to caffine and nicotine?
A fake smile danced on her lips. The guys mother talks about how nice it is to see females getting into professional education and pursuing their careers.
"Oh, maybe my working after marriage could be a possibility."
Too many maybes-too many hopes-too many unanswered questions!
An hour passes. The guys family gets up to leave. Exchange of greetings and kisses. A flow of smiles and nice meeting you's. The girl stands on a side, looking down and can actually feel a quick up to down xraying by the guy.
Thank God its over...oh not really...maybe its just a beginning...What next? What if they do propose?
A mixed array of emotions. Relief, anxiety, happiness, a sinking feeling. Forget it!
Live for the moment. The second the family is out of door, the girl grabs a plate and fills it up with the goodies. Sighs relief, sits cross legged on the floor cushion, smiles a half smile and enjoys the delicassies.....maybe this is the end of the beginning....or the beginning of an end...!
Posted by Kat at
9:38 PM
4 comments
and they know me so well....
Thanx to tree elf....stopped work and took this crazy quiz....but I must admit that they know me to quite an extent....amazing....heres what they have to say:
Has lots of extraordinary ideas. Difficult to fathom. Thinkforward. Unique. brilliant. Sharp thinking. Fine, strong clairvoyance. make good doctors. Dynamic. Secretive. Inquisitive. Know how to dig secrets. Always thinking. Less talkative. amiable. Brave. generous. Patient. Stubborn. hardhearted. Determined. Never quit. Hardly become angry unless provoked. Love to be alone. Think differently. Sharp-minded. Motivate self. Dont appreciate praises. Highspirited. Well-built, tough. Deep love, emotions. Romantic. Uncertain in relationships. Homely. Hardworking. High abilities. Trustworthy. Honest. Keepsecrets. Cant control emotions. Unpredictable.
Posted by Kat at
11:07 AM
1 comments
Previous Posts
sorry
winter comfort
choice
may you forever rest in peace
a lot can happen over coffee
really
let go of the negative energy
color me emotional
secret
karachi
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